Trusting the Unknown

I have trust issues. Many times in my early life what I trusted was happening was not what was really happening and this gave me “issues” with trust. I used to think that made me a rarity but now everywhere I turn, I see someone sporting a monster-truck-show issue that is so big mine seem small by comparison.

I finally sought professional help to work them out because they kept getting in the way of my life. And it really helped. (Some of my issues got worked out and others are still a “work in progress.”)

Part of the work was becoming friends with the unknown. My favorite dance partner, a need to control, was in the picture, too. My biggest problem was I KNEW what needed to be happening. I DID. And when it didn’t, boy did I get upset about it.

This left me feeling way too responsible for stuff and just plain worn out. For years, I was in my own daytime soap opera: Will _____ do the right thing and get their life together? Is _____fooling around on ____ and should I tell them? Did ______realize ______?

I am a slow learner sometimes. My husband’s death taught me a lot about trust. Everything was an unknown for a while there. To survive, I had to let go of trying to control things, I didn’t have the energy for that, which was a blessing in disguise. If no one was having a stroke or dying, it was all good. Death gave me quite the switch up in life perspective!

Since I took myself off the “Committee in Charge of Everything” my life is so much better. There’s a sweetness about trusting the unseen that I savor and an excitement about what God might stick in my life next that energizes me.

Is it time for you to go off the committee? The Widow’s Recovery System is a great way to get the personal support you need to recover and move forward!
Set up your free exploration call.

2 Comments for “Trusting the Unknown”

Barbara Haschmann

says:

I hear you. And I have come a long way in this area; still have some to go. But let me pose a question to my sister-widows. How do you discern between “wanting to control everything” and “being careful that repairs and other services around the house are done correctly because we don’t want to (can’t afford to) waste money”? I have hired people to do things I can’t do myself, and I don’t want to micro-manage them, but when an expert on TV or on a trusted professional webpage says one thing and the guy replacing the dead tree in my yard says another, it is very difficult to trust him! No matter how respectfully I address an issue, I am usually treated as a complaining shrew. I SO miss my husband for these things!!!

says:

I hear you! Widowed women are often seen as “complainers” instead of wise consumers. Men seem to have more credibility with workman than women in general. But it’s important to take care of your big assets, like your house and car! You’re doing the wise thing! Don’t let the fellows get you down Barbara!

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